struggles of the young adult crowd

So some semi-inspired topics came up today, not in conversation or anything like that, but in catching up on some online news, blogs, and forums that I read. Apparently there are a lot of young adults out in the world who feel alienated by many of the churches they attend (or used to attend as the case often is). The following is a highly edited, condensed, and cobbled from many sources view of what many young adults tend to find among churches once they hit the real world.

What I find really disappointing is that young adults are often left out in church. There are youth groups that caters to high school kids. There are young couples groups which make me feel that I can't be included if I am single. Sometimes there are singles groups if you find a larger church, but those often focus on trying to cure you of being single. There are activities for adults, but most of the adults are twice my age, or married, or have kids, or all of the above, which I totally cannot relate to. I'm just really upset that it seems like I don't fit in anywhere, why do they overlook young adults?

To be completely honest, I agree on many levels with this attitude. What is out there waiting for post-college adults (single or married) who need something other than a singles or couples environment? In many cases the answer is: nothing. You either join the all encompassing adult group or you drift by yourself. And sadly, the usual result is drifting because of the often hectic schedule of young adults, especially young professionals. If you are single on top of all that, then forget it because just like the first question young married couples get asked is, "when are you having kids," the young single adult gets bombarded with some variant of, "so when are you getting married?"

Often the one thing that gets asked of young adults is time. Time for attending retreats, or conferences, or mid-week devotionals, or some other church spiritual gathering. You know what - most young adults don't have a ton of spare time on their hands. They are typically running about to attend weddings, manage career responsibilities, meet up with friends from college or high school, see family, and attempting to maintain some kind of social life. If it doesn't fit into that schedule they don't have time, much less the energy to devote to spiritual programs or agendas that quite honestly don't relate to their lives at all. So with all this floating out there for contemplation, you know what the simplest conclusion is....

The reason the young adult populations in churches is dwindling or non-existent is because the entire system is built around being under the age of 18, over the age of 30, or married with kids.

Pretty cut and dry, huh? And quite honestly, the solution really isn't that difficult to come by. What is needed is a place where they can come to talk about the problems or accomplishments in their life where they won't be judged. They need a place they can come to where sporadic attendance isn't frowned upon. They need a place where they don't have to sit and be taught, and at the same time are not expected to be a leader. In short, they need a place they can come to for comfort, growth, and encouragement when they need it.