dealing with change

Change is an interesting beast to tackle, and tackle it we must since no one can go through life experiencing no change whatsoever. Change is neither good nor bad, right nor wrong; change however is inevitable. How we deal with change in our lives can alter our perceptions about the nature of the change, and that reaction can alter impact it has on our life for the future. For the purposes of today's ramblings, I propose that there are 5 ways which we all deal with change: we run after it; we run away from it; we embrace it; we fear it; or we ignore it.

I like dealing with polar opposites, the ideas are so converse to each other that it hardly seems there could be a link, but there always is. Whether we run away from change or chase after it, in my mind the reasons are the same - comfort. Running away from change is a bold statement about the fact that we would rather everything stay just the way it is, where it is what we are used to and feel most comfortable. Accepting change in that mindset means allowing discomfort into one's life for some amount of time, regardless of the possibly benefits - which of course could hardly outweigh the level of comfort one already has and would be giving up temporarily. Conversely, or inversely if you like, running after change displays an attitude of constant discomfort with the way things are, hoping and knowing that things will be better with that one more level of newness in life. The problem there is the lack of contemplation of one's present situation - how can you know things will be better with X, Y, and Z if you never stopped to evaluate life after you attained A, B, and C?

Of course, we can always choose to ignore change - and no I don't mean ignore and avoid, I mean ignore change whether it happens or not. This is probably the most difficult idea to grasp, that someone could completely ignore a change in their life or fail to grasp that change could have happened and didn't. I guess this would qualify as a sort of generic apathy about life. Obviously, this sounds horrid since essentially obliviousness to life's changes would seem to rob one of even the simplest pleasure. Imagine if you will, that day you first tasted what is now your favorite food or beverage. Would your life have been as enriched by your new-found flavor if at that moment you have thought, "Eh, it's food, it's different... whatever?" It's a tough thought line to follow, probably because our lives are punctuated by recognition of the various degrees of change we experience.

Another set of reactions on opposite poles would be fear and embrace. They are not far removed from my previous description of running after or away from change, but the reaction is not as severe. One could consider it more of a moderate optimism versus moderate pessimism. On one hand you have someone who accept change when it comes and recognizes that whether for good or bad, change will come and it is what we make of it that determines the quality of our live afterwards. On the other hand, you have someone who resists change when possible because they have come to think that where their life ends up after the adjustment is out of their control, but since they have recognized that some changes are inevitable they are not always unwilling participants.

Dealing with change is a fact of life, but how we deal with it is not written in stone. Certainly changing our perceptions of change is a difficult task, but that is why we are not alone on this earth. I am a firm believer that sometimes even the unvoiced prayer can be answered, many times in the form of an unlikely or unseen friend. Sometimes we encounter people in our lives who enter in at just that precise moment we need them most, which we always figure out in hindsight. They show up and help us patch up the messy parts or lend a hand through uncharted waters in life.

It's rough around the edges, but this has been my salute to change. May you recognize change when it confronts you, enjoy it when it appeals to you, and find comfort in friends when it frightens you.